Riders - Horizons (III) Page 4

  How could he think for a second I was like that? What had I ever said or ever suggested to raise this doubt?

  I didn't know and wished he hadn't told me this. Now I hated him even more. I wanted to slap his handsome face for all eternity and screw his balls in my fist, so painfully hard he could never walk again.

  I parked up outside, and flew in the door in distress. I fell into my surprised Mom's arms, thankful she was still up this late. I needed her so bad. I sobbed into her shoulder like a crazy lunatic.

  “Tiffany... sweetheart, what's on earth's the matter?”

  What the hell could I say? She deserved some kind of explanation. I didn't want to worry her too much. I tried to say something... and the single word “Josh...” came out...

  I didn't notice she had company until he spoke.

  “Ummm, Miranda, I'd better go.”

  “No, it's fine. I'll just take Tiffany to her room. Calm her down, okay? Please don't go.”

  I raised my tear soaked face, from her wet shoulder and through blurred eyes saw Col standing awkwardly behind us. I liked Col, despite his close association with Joshua. He was good guy, I could tell. Mom had told me about his past and she liked him. A whole damn lot. I didn't want to spoil anything budding between them.

  I pulled myself together, my sobs calming to a gentle shake of my body and pushed away from my mom.

  “It's okay... You guys chill... I can go to bed on my own.”

  “No, I'm taking you to your room.”

  She led me up the stairs and stood me against my door.

  “What happened with Josh, sweetheart?” she asked in a kind voice, her face full of concern.

  “We spoke about something that was very upsetting.”

  “Look, I don't know what's going on with you two. But I know he hasn't been around... is it over?”

  I really needed to tell her, and to tell her everything. But not now. I was mentally exhausted.

  “Oh mom. It's too late to talk it out. I'll tell you tomorrow. Go back to Col, okay? I'm fine. I just need to sleep. I'm sure I'm overwrought with tiredness mainly.”

  “You sure you're alright?” She kissed me on the forehead.

  “I'll live. It was just a bad conversation, that's all.” I tried to raise a smile, but failed.

  “Okay, but I want to know all about it.”

  I wasn't sure I could say the words out loud. I could barely even think them

  “Yeah, night Mom. Love you.” I opened the door and went in, undressing and slipping in between the sheets.

  I cried silently into the pillow as I'd done on several occasions this week.

  I wasn't one hundred percent sure, because I hadn't the money to buy a test, but all the signs were there. Absence of monthly event, subtle body changes, tenderness, a constant funny taste in my mouth.

  It had only taken that once; that one stupid heated mistake.

  Now I was pregnant.

  And very much alone.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  JOSHUA

  She was so distressed I couldn't abandon her. I wasn't sure she was safe to ride a bike at all, but I didn't expect she'd listen to me if I tried to reason with her. So I followed her home, at a discreet distance. Thankfully she arrived without having a serious accident. I stopped at the end of her street and waited for her to go inside. Col's bike was there.

  I was guessing that at least one of the females in the Johnson household was happy tonight.

  I sat for a while, having a smoke and thinking what to do.

  I wasn't giving up on her. We were good together. I wanted her in my life more than any other girl I'd met. I had to find the right words. The right time to say them. And the right place.

  ...Sweetheart, you're my girl, I'm sorry about all that shit, let's give it another go ...wouldn't cut it. It had to be profoundly deeper than that. Somewhere I hadn't been before.

  I finished my cigarette and stubbed it out on the floor beneath my boot. Turning my bike, I set off for home. I'd had a tiring day, out on the ranch all day. It wasn't until I got home that I remembered about Mickey. I wondered if the Sheriff had searched his place yet.

  As I walked across the yard to the bunkhouse, I picked out my cell and discovered a missed call from him. I pressed return call.

  “Hello, Olson County Sherriff's Department.”

  “Hello Sheriff, It's Joshua Lyle, returning your call.”

  “Yes, hello, we searched Mickey Green's place of residence...”

  I waited with some excitement as the Sheriff explained that they had found a box of rounds. They matched those extracted from the dead cattle and also matched the model of gun that was used. But, there was no gun found on his property. In addition, Mickey had slipped out the door immediately they arrived and had driven off somewhere.

  I was so goddamn fucked off about that. “Why couldn't you have cuffed him? Now he knows he's a suspect. He probably keeps the gun in the car and right now he's disposing of it or hiding it somewhere,” I complained.

  “We had no authority to arrest or detain, unless we had the weapon in our charge. We would have gone on to search his vehicle as well. But we are entitled to inquire further into his purchases. We know he bought a Smith and Wesson M & P. That avenue may yield some results in getting our hands on the gun itself. We can get a court order and demand he produces it.” The Sheriff explained testily.

  Despite his assurances, my heart sank. It was unlikely they'd find anything. He could say he lost it or sold it.

  I expressed my thanks for their help, for what it was worth, and shoved my cell away.

  “Fuck the fucker...” God, I was so angry. I stalked off, walking round the back of the main house in the dark. I needed to cool off some before I hit my bed for the night.

  I smoked another two cigarettes, before I'd got my thoughts back in order. Maybe it wasn't such a bad thing. We couldn't prove anything against him, but at least we all knew the lie of the land. Maybe that would be enough to stop him repeating the crime? He knew we'd look at him first, if it happened again. Okay, so he wouldn't be punished for what he did, but hopefully that would be the end of it.

  It was well after 1 a.m. when I finally went inside. I said, “hey, night owl,” to Pete as I passed him in the common room where he was making himself some coffee.

  “Want some?”

  “Not for me, I really need to sleep. Coffee ain't gonna help.”

  I walked down the corridor and entered my bedroom to gather my stuff for a shower.

  But before I could do that a loud noise erupted outside.

  A car horn blared so long and loudly it would have woken the dead.

  I dropped what I'd been doing and made my way outside with a few of the other guys who were still awake.

  There was Mickey's car, the bright red paintwork shining like a beacon under the yard security lights.

  “That's enough already,” I shouted at him.

  The horn stopped and my ears rang. Pete stood at my side as we watched Mickey get out of his old Chevy and walk toward us. My father left the main building, wrapped in his robe, with Rob in close pursuit, and we all converged on our unwanted and uninvited guest.

  He was soon surrounded by six of us.

  “What you doing here, Green?” my father asked him angrily. He rubbed his red and bleary eyes. He'd obviously been fast asleep.

  “Came to see you Lyle. It's about time we cleared the air.”

  “I have nothing to say to you and no air to clear.”

  “I think you owe me an apology. In front of these good people.”

  “An apology? Now why on earth would I apologize to you?”

  “You robbed my good family of their money and forced them outta town. You undervalued the bar to punish me for the past. You're a real piece Charlie Lyle? Proud of yourself, are ya? You've just about ruined me. Poor Annie, having to live with a cold hearted bastard like you.”

  “Um, Mickey, you'd better shut up...” I interrupted angrily, disgust
ed he was bringing my dead mother into it... But my father held his hand up silencing me.

  “No Josh, let me answer that.”

  “I'm a businessman, which means I've got where I am today by making wise decisions about money. If you weren't happy with my offer, you could have turned it down. No one had a gun on you, forcing you to deal with me.”

  “I was in no position to refuse. And you knew that.”

  “Your financial situation was not my problem. I made what I felt was a fair offer for a business which was, quite frankly, in dire straits. I got you out of your jam. You should be thankful Mickey Green. Thankful. Now get your cheap hide off my ranch. The sight of you makes my skin crawl. You goddamn creep. What she saw in you I'll never understand.”

  “Shut the fuck up.” Mickeys eyes blazed at him and then, oddly, flicked to mine.

  There was a very strange atmosphere, underlying the deep animosity between the two men. I wondered what the hell was going on?

  “She... who's she?” I asked.

  “Your mother.” My father replied.

  “I'm confused. What has Mom got to do with Mickey Green?”

  “Maybe you should ask him? Apparently, he could be your father...” the words rolled off his tongue so calmly. There was a loud, collective gasp and shock ripped through me. “Although I personally doubt it,” he added as a softening blow.

  “No...!” I shook my head. “No way... that's a lie...”

  I looked to the other faces staring at me, registering just as much shock as I was.

  “You goddamn fucking bastard, Charlie Lyle.” Mickey ground out through gritted teeth. “You promised her you'd never mention it. You promised on your life. You promised to keep her good name if she stayed with you.”

  “I really don't think Anne cares anymore. I guess it's time it all came out. Josh deserves to know.”

  “Mickey?” I said in an agonized tone. “You could really be my father?”

  Charlie's cold attitude toward me was now making perfect sense. He wasn't even sure I was his son. Although he'd tried to treat me as such, for my mother's sake. I didn't know how I felt any more. My whole world was tipped upside down.

  I could be a Green? For God's sakes NO. I couldn't fucking bear it.

  I tried to listen to what Mickey said, but my mind was reeling.

  I didn't look like Mickey, did I? I looked far more like Charlie, I was goddamn sure of that.

  “We never found out for sure. Charlie was insistent that you were his. He wanted you to be brought up as a Lyle. No matter who your father was. And Annie didn't want me to do the DNA test, to defy him or to take the risk of anyone finding out. She feared the consequences and didn't want you to be disadvantaged in life, or to be treated differently to your sister.”

  “For fuck's sake, how did you get together with my mother?” I was incredulous. I could never imagine my lovely, beautiful mother having sex with this slime-ball. Never in a million years.

  “We were old news. We knew each other way before she got together with Charlie. We were high-school sweethearts, way back. I wasn't like I am now. I had hopes and dreams. I had plans. I was a good guy. I openly admit I'm not anymore. Life's dealt me some tough shit. And I've done everything I shouldn't. Every decision has taken me around the wrong corner. I got into some real bad stuff along the way. But Josh, I loved your mother. I always did. And she knew that. God knows why she married him.”

  “You took off, didn't you? You abandoned her. And in the end she loved me far more than she ever loved you, that's why she married me and didn't hang around for you.”

  “I was twenty one and not ready to settle down. I told her I'd be back and I was. I needed some time to grow.”

  My heart sank, because of the similarity between Mickey and me. That was exactly what I'd done. What I'd needed. To experience life and grow.

  “Time to grow? Five years is a lot of growing, Green. But, that's all by the by. When you came back you wrecked her. You ruined my beautiful wife. You turned her head and twisted her mind against me.” Charlie accused Mickey.

  “You did that all yourself, Lyle. If you'd taken notice of her instead of having your head up your important fucking ass, or constantly looking for business opportunities, you might have noticed she was getting more and more unhappy as the years passed by. She was desperate for some attention and real loving and I gave her that. It was such a shame that in the end the only way she could escape from you was to leave this world the way she did. By dying.”

  “Excuse me? You don't know what you're talking about. You're delusional and you've gone way too far.... Get this cretin lowlife off my property this instant,” Charlie commanded, almost roaring with anger.

  I listened in utter astonishment at the unknown unfolding before me. I was amazed I knew nothing about this, Not a thing. Not that I completely understood it yet. Or knew the truth of it. For obvious reasons I took all Mickey said with a pinch of salt. The guy exaggerated and lied through his teeth. I would never believe anything he ever told me again without firm proof of it.

  Mickey sneered at Charlie. “She told me everything. Everything... the silent, cold treatment. For weeks on end you wouldn't even speak to her. How you punished her in the bedroom. The way you wouldn't let her go anywhere, keeping her tied to the ranch. How you picked on Josh to hurt her and belittled everything he did. I begged her to come away with me, but she wouldn't leave her family. Annie was loyal to a fault. She was a saint.” Mickey continued.

  “Of course she wouldn't leave us. And why the hell would she want to go away with you? Look at you. You're a low-life. A nothing. What could you hope to give her? And you're a liar Mickey Green. I never treated Anne that way. You've made me sound like some kind of monster. I know all about you and her. All you were was a big mistake. A few months of weakness, something from her past. I forgave her that a long time ago. I'm not denying there were a lot of difficulties in my marriage, and you were the sole cause of that. You should have left her alone. You were a thorn in her side. And mine.”

  “A few months? We were lovers for years. Years... You can say and believe what you want, Mr High and Mighty Lyle. I know the truth. In her heart she belonged to me. She was always my sweet Annie. In the end, she despised you just as much as I despise you. I let myself slide into some deep shit after Annie married you. How many years have I been in that shit...” he shook his head, “Christ, only half my goddamn life! I was sick of myself. Sick to my teeth of what I'd become. I had no self respect. But you know, I was just starting to drag myself out of it. I've found another sweet woman. A widow. Someone I care about. Someone who cares about me. She's a hairdresser with her own place west of here. I actually have something to look forward to in life. Well I did. Because now, it seems you have to ruin that as well. To top it off, you set the goddamn Sheriff on me over a few fucking cows? Well fuck you! If I'm gonna go to jail, it may as well be for a good reason. I'm just about done with you. This is for me and Annie. For ruining both our lives. You fucking bastard. You're gonna pay and you're gonna die.”

  It all happened so fast.

  Charlie moved toward Mickey, his arms raised, about to strangle him, and so red with anger he looked ready to explode.

  Mickey pulled a gun from inside his jacket, pointing it at Charlie.

  My eyes flew to it in horror.

  “You deserve a bullet far more than your freaking cows,” he said and a mad smile lit up his face.

  He'd lost it. Truly lost it. He was deranged.

  “Give me the gun, Mickey. Please.” I said slowly and clearly, and although my heart was pounding like crazy with fear, I moved to stop him firing the gun. I stood between the two of them with my hand raised in a calming gesture. Pete tried to disarm him, from the side, and he struggled with him but Mickey shook him off.

  There was a resounding loud noise, which echoed around the yard, and a sudden stabbing hot pain in my stomach.

  I looked down, clutching myself as blood spread across my white
t-shirt.

  “No.” I groaned, in horrified realization and disbelief.

  The guys wrestled Mickey to the ground. I felt dizzy as I spun round and fell into Charlie's arms.

  “I'm shot...help me.” I gasped.

  “Josh, no...” his eyes were full of horror. “Oh God, no, please don't die.”

  A lightheadedness, a hazy kind of sensation took a hold of me. I lost all the feeling in my legs and arms, and my stomach burned with an unbearable fire.

  A dark mist invaded my mind

  Through the dimming haze, I heard someone calling in the paramedics.

  Am I dying?

  “Dad...?” I appealed, my voice weak as he crushed me to him.

  “I love you, son.” He choked out.

  Despite everything... all the cold shoulders and shit I had taken from him in the past... all that I'd heard Mickey say about him and my current confusion about him and my mother... those special words were still something I needed to hear. Whether he was my biological father or not was irrelevant. I needed his love and respect. For years and years, ever since I could remember, I'd had no recognition or affection from him. It was a crying shame it took such extremes as this to make him realize his feelings for me and that I was actually dying when I finally heard him say it.

  I whispered in his ear. I didn't know if he could hear me because I could hardly speak. “Love you, Pa. Tell Tiffany I love her too.”

  She was the last thought in my head.

  Her beautiful face was smiling at me. I felt her soft fair hair wrapped around my hands. Her scent was all around me. I felt so high just thinking of her.

  I'd have done anything for that woman.

  Anything.

  She was mine. Meant for me.

  Deep regret flooded through me―that I'd thought so badly of her.

  I loved her―everything about her.

  Suddenly, there was no noise, anywhere.

  I was floating in a strange nothing and so full of fear.

  Oh God... Tiffany... I don't want to go.

  My senses closed down.

  And the lights went out in my world.